17 Sept 2018

Why you should never stop growing as a person (and stop comparing your life)

Recently I’ve been thinking about my long term life goals, maybe because I’m 26 in a few months and I’ll officially be more than halfway to 50 (fml). What do I actually want from life? Is what I’m doing enough? Am I settling? All of these questions I’m starting to ask myself. Generally, I’m quite an upbeat and happy person with drive and passion towards any goal that I have - I’m in a job I love, I have amazing friends and family and I do love life, but recently I feel like my goals have slipped and I’m not pushing myself anymore because I’m ‘comfortable’ coasting along with everything.

There’s been a number of times where I’ve given up and not pursued something because of excuses. ‘I’ve had a busy week at work’ or ‘I’ll do it tomorrow or next week’ which then turns into a few more weeks, a few months and then a whole year of not chasing something new. Don’t get me wrong, we are all allowed off days when it all gets too much. Sometimes I just want to stay in bed all day watching reruns of The Real Housewives, smother my face in face masks (cos’ they fix everything right?) and drown in gallons of wine - but other days I wake up feeling like I can conquer anything and have all the inspiration in the world. The ups and downs of being a human being I guess… 

I do on the other hand think we are living in a world that’s extremely hard to keep up with. We all need successful blogs, a good job, a large Instagram following, be #couplegoals with someone, all whilst maintaining a healthy social life (and make it to the gym from time to time). I try never to compare my life to someone else’s on social media, because it’s toxic and makes you think should be doing more and it’s a downward spiral from there on in. Life should be about YOUR life (not all the Insta lies). 

Back to self growth - I saw this quote over the weekend and it really made me think: 

‘Stop letting the obstacles put in your path that were meant to grow you, stop you.’ 

I always forget that the ups and downs in life always have a positive outcome in the end - everything does work out and everything does happen for a reason. You shouldn’t stop growing and pushing yourself just because something big or small gets in the way. You can do ANYTHING you set your mind to and I’m so over stunting my growth (personally and professionally) because I am scared of overcoming obstacles, failing or worried about what others will say. 

This also stems onto another topic, which is about doing everything in your power to make someone else happy but losing what makes YOU happy in the process. I’m the most guilty person of putting other people's needs before mine even if they don’t do the same in return - maybe I’m too nice or just a pushover? People may take my kindness for weakness becasue I would do anything for the people I care about but now I realise that there needs to be a line which can’t be crossed. I think this also comes down to having the self-confidence to be able to stand on your own two feet and not let someone else's opinion have an impact on what you want to do in life. Time and time again people will make digs about other peoples lives, think they can tell you how to live your own life or judge others through a screen, but those negatives will come right back at ya one day. 

The outcome of all of the above feelings and realisations is that I’m starting to understand what I want and what really makes me happy. I’ve made a vow to start pushing myself to pursue everything I actually want do (without worrying what others are doing), not make excuses and not listen to outside opinions. This doesn’t mean putting pressure on myself to ‘keep up’ with everyone else - like I say, I try my hardest to never let social media make me feel like I’m not enough, it’s about my own goals and aspirations being ticked off and the main goal above all, is to be happy within myself. 


Photography by @tylercarrphoto


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